Saturday

Nerd Notes

It has come, finally, tumbling down the basement stairs, through the musty silence of my private life and upon me, it has come, the realization that I am a nerd in full measure, not partially or with reluctance but in all it's blaring intensity and mystic grace, the fact has hit me. It has something to do with my meditations on my relationship with women in society. The insight was given way by a simple question, why have I not found the one woman of my life? Or better still, why does such a connection look so impossible? I have in my pursuit to answer these questions come to face that one fact about me, which came tumbling down my secret cellar stairs, that I have concerned my self with things that do not concern this world or at least a lot of people in it. I am concerned, gentlemen, for instance, that I may not in my lifetime have the one big Idea that will change the world, I am concerned that I may not be able to lead a life which permits me to watch three art films in a row whenever I wish to, or say concerned that I may not be able to finish those novels this vacation. May I assure you ladies and gentlemen that these concerns run deep and that I can go so far as to say that they are really the only concerns I have. Now will you not agree my dear fellowmen, that a man can be well understood by the concern he keeps? Indeed that is what makes a man what he is to the society.

I am a nerd, and let me assure you, sirs, that I have no regrets. But there is still something I think that must be said, said in the defense of my species, of my comrades and their ability to love people. We are a strange breed, but we do love. We have a concept of love that is not very common, or shall I say mundane. We are passionate lovers but we hate conceptions of love that intrude in that private cellar of ours, we hate it when people link love to interdependence, when our concerns are not given the respect that we feel they deserve, we hate all that. Time gentlemen? Are you asking me about time? Yes, we believe that time must be spent with the people you love, only we don't think that much needs to be said while the time is being spent, certainly, a hug is a wonderful idea, but a verbal reassurance of love every time and again, sir, we feel is redundant. Our relations are not forced, If I may say that, they are voluntary, completely mature and serious, and what seriousness there is in a relationship that cribs for constant attention? In a relationship that completely demolishes the private cellar each one of us owns and forgets for the sake of relationships? No sir , we refuse to let go our secret cellar, yes we wish to posses it, for we believe that to be the only pool of sanity left in this desert that has gone wild with insecurity.

8 comments:

Chitrak said...

Amen, at least for the first para. the second requires redigestion. BTW, heyyyyy, wassup?

Sagar Kolte said...

Chit~ Thanks, I'm fine, waiting for my exams to get over.

Dev said...

You have stolen my thought...
I have been thinking along these very lines for some time now, but they have been incoherent ramblings so far. Once something concrete comes out, I'll comment something or write a post

IG said...

Having been a Mumbaikar/Bombayite all your life, you have picked up some streetsmartness which is so unlike a nerd...
anyway, seems like you are interested in a nerd girlfriend...All The Best !!!

Anonymous said...

You are so gay

Supriya said...

Wondering why u've mostly only addressed the male species, throughout the post..
I think about it too. Not the 'why have I not found the one (wo)man of my life' Q; but the 'why does such a connection look so impossible' Q. I keep thinking, 'theres still so many things i want to experience in life - how will i ever find the time once there's a whole other person'.
Could it be egotism, not nerdiness?

Sagar Kolte said...

Supriya~ Sorry about the over use of 'gentelmen' it was certainly not meant to be that way. It cannot be egotism, the plain fact is that you are too busy to have a Girlfriend/Boyfriend. And you are busy out of choice.

Chitrak said...

Haha, just like to note that he's open to the fact you might be lesbian :D.

As for the topic of discussion, i believe i've said enough on MeF's blog...in fact shaggs i may be saying more! :D

(Ah...aimless philosophy, how i've missed it)

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